Reinstating the Golden Rule

Traveling on business with clients last week, I got into conversation with a waiter in Providence, Rhode Island. Somehow we got to talking about philosophy of work, and he said that his favorite customers are the tough ones. That he takes it as a personal and welcome challenge to figure out something that will cause them to marvel to themselves that they have nothing to complain about.

He told me about one couple that loves thousand island dressing on their salad. The restaurant doesn’t serve thousand island, but the waiter, Paul, makes it for them when they come in. He told me a couple of other similar stories involving oysters rockefeller and pizaola, and what fun it is to surprise customers by going the extra mile and really getting them what they want. And, he added, he notices that they return. Again and again. Not a bad marketing plan. He went on to recount a conversation he’d had with a chef. Paul asked for a particular preparation of a dish, at the request of a customer. The chef said, “That’s not the way I make it.” And Paul said, “But that’s the way they want it.” It’s a question of where the focus is. “It’s not hard,” Paul told me. “You just put yourself in their shoes, and ask yourself, ‘If I’m going out, what would I want?’”

Sounds like something I don’t hear people talk about much: the golden rule.

Now, a couple of things to keep in mind:

• Paul didn’t have his head in the clouds. He did say that if the people that like the special salad dressing come in at a very busy hour, and he’s not able to step aside and make the dressing, it doesn’t happen that night
  
• Being a food lover, I appreciate a chef who knows great ingredients and combinations better than I do and steers me away from substitutions I request that he or she knows won’t work
  

So the point here isn’t turning oneself inappropriately into Gumby, and doing things that don’t make sense. The point is to consider where your focus is. In business and in life, the golden rule, putting oneself into another’s shoes and thinking about what they would like, is “the golden rule” for a reason: It’s a wonderful way to strengthen relationships, a powerful way to build business, and because people don’t tend to expect it—it’s just plain fun to surprise them.