Deciding What Gets in Your Head

Sayulita, Mexico. 8:00 a.m., sometime last week. 

The view outside my front door.

The thing about there being places like this in the world, is just that. There are places like this in the world.

My reaction to this spot was similar to my reaction to standing at the Trevi Fountain for the first time. I mean, besides “Wow.” It was, “You mean that while I’m back home working on tough projects and getting cut off by stressed-out drivers and dealing with people who are bent out of shape by whatever…this is here? All of the time? While I’m caught up in all the stuff I’m caught up in: This beach is here. This fountain is here. This (fill in the blank with whatever in the world inspires and calms you) is here.

I’m intrigued with the success of Gretchen Rubin’s “Happiness Project.” Among many other things, its success points to the obvious—people want to be happy. Duh. Happy for the sake of happy, a good thing. And—I invite us to go further—happy for the sake of being productive, also a good thing. Think about it. When you’re feeling happy, inspired and calm, you tend to do better work. Yes, there are times you’ve pulled it out of nowhere and excelled in tight spots when you were stressed out and not feeling so great. Over the course of a career, though, sustained success tends to come from a different place than stress and negativity.

So.

You’re on the freeway and people are driving like crazy people. Makes you mad. You’re at work and someone takes the credit for your idea. Makes you furious. Here’s a thought. Esoteric, maybe. Useful, most certainly. There are people in the world who don’t drive thoughtfully and who don’t work fairly and a lot of other unfortunate things. Yes. And, there are places in the world where the waves are crashing and the fountains are flowing and the mountains are standing. Since they’re both realities, which one will you let inside your head? Completely up to you. Most people go by geographical proximity, and let whatever’s in front of them get inside their head. And wind up feeling…wound up. And they act like it. But just because the crazy driver and the difficult coworker are right in front of you, and the waves and the fountain are a few dozen or thousand miles away, why should you let the driver and the person at work get inside your head and stress you out? How about this: Let the waves and the fountain get inside your head. They are real (just at a distance), so why not? And now, in this state, make solid choices about how to drive safely and work well with the crazy drivers and difficult colleagues. I guarantee you, your choices will be more balanced and wise, and your outcomes will ultimately be improved. This is more than just “going to your happy place” and checking out. This is embracing reality—a larger reality. And one that’s going to serve you better than letting what’s in your face get to you.

Happier? Yes. More productive? Very much yes.

Now

"If we wait for the moment when everything, absolutely everything is ready, we shall never begin."

- Ivan Turgenev

Dialing It Up

“Is life not a hundred times too short for us to stifle ourselves?”   

- Friedrich Nietzsche

“Sometimes something worth doing is worth overdoing.”  

 - David Letterman

I read a quote yesterday that caught my eye: “You have to come up with an idea and make it big,” Anthony Todd, designer and art director. In talking about his New York event projects, Todd sees his responsibility to his clients as not simply coming up with great ideas, but going big. As I thought about Todd’s statement, several others came to mind:

• Famous Chicago architect, Daniel Burnham, said, "Make no little plans; they have no magic to stir men's blood and probably themselves will not be realized."
  
• Thomas Leonard, early pioneer in the field of personal and professional coaching, advised clients to “Build a superreserve in every area.” The idea is to not live in a miserly way. To get yourself out of scarcity thinking. To take actions that begin to shift that habit of thinking—like going to Costco and buying an over-supply of something that’s easy to run out of, such as paper towels.
  
• Gretchen Rubin, author of New York Times bestseller, The Happiness Project, has “Twelve Personal Commandments.” One is to “spend out.” By spending out she’s thinking along the lines of Thomas Leonard—rather than hoarding and over-saving, to use what you have with joy and boldness.
  

A designer, an architect, a coach, a writer. All honing in on this idea of living Big. Bold. Full.

Have you been playing small? Have you been miserly in some way? Have you been saving or putting off things for too long—

• possessions
  
• ideas
  
• activities
  
• talents
  

Whatever comes to mind, dial it up this week. In your mind's eye, see your hand turning the dial...way up.

I have a couple of ways I’ll be applying this in my life this week. A very simple one is...sleep! Arianna Huffington gave a Ted Talk in January in which she spoke of the power of sleep, how there’s a snobbery around getting limited sleep, and what it costs us in our ability to work well and make sound decisions. This week, contrary to my habit of cheating myself out of full rest, I’m going to get plenty of sleep.

What will you dial up this week?

Better Definitions

How is your week going to go? Up to you.

Do you have projects to work on, deadlines to meet, situations to resolve and people to work with that you deem:

• Impossible
  
• Ridiculous
  
• Awful
  
• Dreaded
  
• Boring…?
  

So be it.

Only remember this: your mind is an amazing tool. And a dedicated one—dedicated to you. And it will do your bidding. If you deem things as listed above, then they’re likely to be just that. On the other hand, if you take a different tack and redefine those projects, deadlines, situations and people as:

• Challenging
  
• Different
  
• Interesting
  
• An opportunity to _______ (fill in the blank with whatever is useful to you, e.g. try a different approach, learn something new, challenge yourself, do your best work, persevere, be creative…)
  

…the outcomes you achieve may be different than the outcomes you achieve with the first list of definitions. Why? Your mind. “Impossible” shuts the mind down. Door closed. That’s it. “Challenging” leaves the door open (even if only a crack), your mind has room to be creative, and is much more likely to help you come up with something that will be useful to you in resolving something tough.

The power of how we define things has been widely researched and published, and bears taking seriously. Just ask the Swiss. 1968 Switzerland had 65% of world watch market sales and more than 80% of the profits. Then, the electronic quartz watch emerged. And the Swiss ignored it. Why? One reason: the definition of “a quality watch.” The Swiss definition of a quality watch included, without question, “A watch that involves gears and bearings and mainsprings.” End of story. And by 1980, Swiss watch sales market share had dropped to 10%, and their profits to 20%. Between 1969 and 1981, 50,000 of the 62,000 Swiss watchmakers lost their jobs. A national catastrophe. And the kicker: the Swiss themselves had invented the electronic quartz watch. It was dismissed within Switzerland, but the Japanese certainly took note, and the rest is history.

This week:

1. Identify the most important items on your calendar
   
2. Consider the definitions you are giving them—are those definitions serving you? If not,
   
3. Get creative and give your brain something better to work with—better definitions