Getting on Track and Staying There

How do we have productive conversations that stay on track and allow us to accomplish goals? Whether it’s a departmental or team discussion, a meeting with a customer, or a conversation in your personal life, things can get complicated. Wading through the various pieces of information that come from differing perspectives and the dynamics that arise from differing motivations and preferences can result in confusion, frustration, and lack of alignment and/or commitment.

One of our greatest tools for staying on track and avoiding the mess is also one of the most fundamental. And although it’s so fundamental, or perhaps because it is, it’s also most often misunderstood and misused. And as a result, is no help to us at all. Correctly understood and accurately harnessed, it’s a powerful force in successful dialogue, problem solving, and forward movement.

The tool:

An Agenda

Where We Go Wrong—Four Critical Mistakes:

1. We don't use the agenda properly. Go through the agenda twice: once, at the beginning of the meeting. This is the short version; no details yet. Then, spend the rest of the meeting going through the agenda a second time—this time with details and discussion. It's not enough to do this second piece. People leave out the first piece constantly, because they make assumptions about everyone's understanding and alignment. You must do both: short version, then long version.
2. We don’t get agreement on the agenda. When you lay out an agenda, find out what the others think about it, and invite them to add items they feel are critical.
   
3. We don’t stick to the agenda. Assuming we do get agreement on the agenda, we then let people run away with the meeting with every extraneous issue and tangent that comes to their mind. I don’t mean that we shouldn’t vary from the agenda if it makes more sense to do so. The agenda is there to serve you, and if something more important surfaces, then by all means, veer from the agenda. But here’s the trick: you must address the “veering off.” Don’t just go off agenda without acknowledging and getting agreement. “Everyone, it looks like something has surfaced that’s critical for us to address. Let’s agree on how we want to handle our remaining time—do we focus on this issue, or stick to the agenda, and take this issue up at another time? What’s going to be the most productive use of our time?”
   
4. We only use agendas for formal meetings—as if we think the purpose of an agenda is pomp and show. The purpose of an agenda is a great discussion that actually goes somewhere logical and accomplishes something useful. Use agendas liberally. Use them in your personal life. Seriously—as a list of what you need to talk about. “Hey Joe—now that we have a minute—let’s connect on a few things. How about if we touch base on what we want to do with the garage, and nail down a date for the party. That’s all I can think of—how about you? What else should we touch base on?"
   

Again, because the agenda is such a universal tool, we think we know it and we think we use it, and well. My experience is that this isn’t the case.

A client told me last week that this deeper idea of the agenda, not just creating it, but sticking to it even when (or especially because) the discussion is starting to get chaotic, has made all the difference for him in having organized conversations that actually get something done.

This week, look for opportunities to either:

• Stick to an agenda in a meeting that seems to be going off-track (or to only veer from the agenda if it makes sense and if the “veering” is addressed and agreed upon), or
  
• Use an agenda in an informal conversation that, while informal, could still benefit from agreement on a list of topics to discuss